My husband, Ramsay & I, during our trip to Iceland in 2018 — *My husband and I during our trip to Iceland in 2018*

Having been on more than a few trips with my husband, I have learned a thing or two about traveling with one’s significant other. One of the lessons that I learned early on is that although traveling with your partner can strengthen your relationship, it can just as easily weaken it if certain missteps are not avoided. What follows are my tips for helping to ensure a positive and memorable trip with your better half.

1. Plan the trip together. It is important that you both have a say in not only selecting your travel destination but also deciding upon the points of interest that you will visit. With regard to the latter, you are both going to have to be willing to compromise, for inevitably, there will be at least one place that one of you is adamant about seeing but the other couldn’t care less about visiting. In these situations, it is important to make concessions. If your partner is very excited about visiting a museum that you are less than enthused about, be accommodating and go to the museum, because if in the future the roles are reversed, your partner will be more likely to visit a place that they are indifferent toward if you paid them the same courtesy.

2. Decide upon a budget together. Before delving too far into your travel plans, you and your significant other need to have an open and honest conversation about how much money you are both looking to spend on the trip. While you may be longing to spend a month traipsing about Europe, your partner might have a shorter, more affordable vacation in mind. You need to determine how much money each of you is comfortable spending, and then, based on that budget, you should research which locations, as well as time frames, are feasible. It is important that neither of you tries to pressure the other into spending more money on the trip; you must respect one another’s budgets.

3. Don’t try to cram too much into your trip. Here’s a piece of advice that I wish someone had told my husband and me prior to our trip to Scotland in 2017. We spent a large chunk of our vacation in the car, driving well over 1,000 miles in eight days in order to make it to all of the sites on our itinerary. Did we enjoy the trip? Of course, but spending so much time on the move took its toll on both of us. Instead of losing ourselves in the moment and meandering around places at a leisurely pace, we were always hyper-aware of the time in order to ensure that we allowed enough time for driving to our next destination. This constant effort to stick to our packed schedule caused us to feel a tad stressed at times (and might have resulted in a couple of pointless arguments). So, learn from our mistake, and don’t try to do too many things during your trip. If possible, try to spend at least two days at each area in order to avoid traveling every day during your vacation.

4. Draw upon one another’s strengths. When planning your trip, as well as during it, you should draw upon each other’s strengths. If one of you, for instance, is an organizer extraordinaire, have that person oversee the packing of your suitcases, or if one of you is knowledgeable about the local food scene, let them be in charge of scouting out potential restaurants. Take advantage of one another’s skills and knowledge.

5. Make time for couple-y things. In between your visits to all of the tourist hotspots, set aside some time for yourselves as a couple. Be it going out to dinner at a restaurant that you have both been eager to try or simply relaxing at night together in your hotel room, it is important to take a breather from sightseeing for a little bit each day to just enjoy one another’s company.

6. If an argument occurs, resolve it immediately. When you are spending so much time together with a person, it is pretty much inevitable that you will have an argument, even if only a minor one, with them. If a disagreement does arise, you and your partner need to resolve it immediately; you should not give one another the silent treatment or delay discussing the issue until later. Experience has taught me that the longer you wait to resolve a dispute, the harder it is to resolve.

7. Laugh. Related to tip #6, there is no better preventative measure against arguments than laughter. When something goes humorously awry on your trip, laugh rather than become irate. If you or your partner does something embarrassing, find the humor in the situation and laugh. Sharing a good laugh with your significant other helps to keep the mood positive.

8. Be considerate. Another way to keep things upbeat during your trip is to show consideration toward your partner. You should try to stay attuned to your significant other’s current state, both physical and emotional, and respond accordingly. If, for example, your partner appears tired, rather than try to convince them to soldier on and continue sightseeing, ask them if they would like to take a break. Similarly, if you can hear your partner’s stomach growling every few seconds, you might suggest stopping to grab something to eat. Being a caring, considerate person is essential for a fun, memorable trip with your partner.

9. Try something new together. Be it sampling an item of food that neither of you has eaten before or attending a local festival that neither of you has previously attended, try to share a new experience together. Doing something for the first time together can make you feel closer as a couple, and it also provides some wonderful memories.

10. Go with the flow. While having at least a rough itinerary for your trip is helpful, being open to the unplanned is key. From spending an evening watching Eurovision with locals in Iceland to sitting around a fire with new friends in the Scottish Highlands, some of the best times that my husband and I have had together while on vacation were those that we hadn’t planned. So, when it comes to your itinerary, be flexible.

Have you ever traveled with a partner? Do you have any additional pieces of advice? Leave your thoughts in the comments below!